“You’ve got a voice and people will be interested to hear what you have to say. You’re not yet fifty. Everyone is writing about how fabulous it is to be in their fifties, or how great it is to be forty… but how does it feel to be forty nine? That’s what you need to be writing about.”
… And so it began.
Those sage words of advice were from Dixie Maria Carlton, my writing coach and also an established author in her own right, with many books under her belt. Including her recent and shamelessly controversial publication; That Sex Book, which delves into sex and relationships after fifty.
“Start a gratitude journal. Commit to writing every day and write it from your perspective as a forty nine year old woman in today’s world. How do you feel now that you have spare time with the kids all grown up, being a grandparent, menopause, sex, relationships, career – you’ve got a voice you just need to put it to paper.”
Part of me wants to accept this challenge with open arms. I’m already thinking of the topics I could write about and the spin I’d put on them.
Then the doubting thomas inside dies a little and sighs… why bother? I’m no different to every other wannabe writer out there, trying to find a voice in a sea of word vomit on the internet. Like… who really cares what a premenopausal woman, hurtling into middle age has to say about anything?
But then… if no one cares what I have to say, does that matter, and should I even give a toss?
Probably no. Actually, if no one bothers to read this blog, it’s probably a blessing.
There’s a saying; “Write like no one is reading”
Those words will set me free to delve into the topics that I REALLY want to write about.
A writing challenge will help me form good daily writing habits again – something I haven’t continued with after finishing my first (and only) novel. It will be a pseudo daily gratitude/personal journal, to acknowledge the journey I’ve been on, put some demons to rest and help me develop the courage to be the most authentic version of me for the years ahead. Writing stuff down can be cathartic, it’s good for the soul and it’s also a great way to relax. In fact, this first post has a word count of less than five hundred words and I already feel calmer and more at peace with the day, than I did when I woke up this morning.
So Dixie Maria… Yes, I accept this challenge. I will commit to writing daily. Warts and all.
It may be complete crap, but hopefully I’ll uncover some little nuggets of gold along the way and you never know, this little journal could help set free the writer lurking within.
Hello,
I was just reading your blog and funny enough, I just turned 48, so I found this an amazing blog. You really spoke from the heart and talk about how writing is hard, but yet at the same time can do so much good for us.
We are suppose to be the super important women at our age, and people apparently want to hear what we have to say. So you go girl and give it all you have. Let everyone hear what you have to say.
Great job
Coralie
Hi Coralie – thank you so much for kind words. It’s a strange age isn’t it? I mean that both about being 49 and being in this time. We can and do have it all at our feet, but is that really what we truly want? The more I walk through this life, the more I want to relinquish the control freak within me and just let things be. A topic definitely worth exploring further! Please feel free to bookmark this page, I’d love your comments and feedback as another child of the 70’s! Best wishes, Karen
Wow, I think it is a great write up. Probably that is why you feel relaxed after writing it. Even I feel good after reading it, as it comes straight from your heart. In such cases word count truly doesn’t matter!!
Honestly speaking, writing sometimes depends on our moods, as well. Effective writing requires a calm mind. I also practice writing daily, writing a book is my goal, but sometimes I fail to do so. I thank WA for giving this opportunity to comment on other posts. I like it a lot. Surely, this commenting habit may take up a better form in the future.
Thanks a lot for sharing your write-up. I truly wish you all the very best in your Writing Challenge.
Akshay
Hiya Akshay, thanks for reading and sharing your feedback. Interestingly, I’d had a bit of an argument with my husband this morning, and just through the act of sitting down and committing to writing something, completely calmed and centred my mood! I feel like a nice person again haha… That’s just one more reason why I should write every day! Thanks again for dropping by, Cheers, Karen
Interesting. Several years ago, I had just left my job and in the time I would have been in the traffic on my way to work, I found I didn’t know what to do. One morning I wrote a page about how uncertain life had become, and the next morning another page. In those days, journaling was not yet a buzz word. After several months while reviewing my daily thoughts, I realized that there were ideas and thoughts that might be good to share so I published my little book “The Joy of Knowing”. This daily writing has a way to develop something worthwhile, even if it doesn’t seem that way at the time. Write on !
Wow, thank you so much for sharing your story! What you are saying is something very similar to what Dixie Maria said to me… that just by the act of writing, the story I need to write will find me. The topic is as of yet unclear, but through the writing process it will evolve. There’s that word again – EVOLVE… this year is the year! Thanks so much for sharing. Cheers, Karen
I am always interested in a writing challenge. I am not an accomplish writer and I was very scared of writing before starting my blog. But after being part of a writing challenge, after a great struggle, I came to love writing and creating content.
What helped me was the accountability part, you set goals and you have to meet them. Having someone to check on you, to push you and remind why you are doing the challenge. It is a really great experience. So yes I am always ready for a writing challenge.
And I hope you will do it and succeed. The topic you choose will always get readers, do not worry, just do a good keyword search and go for it.
Thanks
Thanks for that. I’ve decided that for the purposes of this challenge that I’m not going to stress too much about SEO and keywords. I want to write and be authentic in what I’m putting out there, rather than writing for Google searches. It’s a bit of a departure from the writing I’ve done in the past… so hopefully I won’t land flat on my face!
I think it’s great to commit yourself to this writing challenge. I loved your comment about the word vomit that is out there, that’s one I’m going to remember. And I’d also just like to tell you that, if you put your heart into your writing, if you are sincere and real, if you are doing it for yourself in the first place, that’s when you will be surprised about the outcome, people want to see real words these days, something to relate to, not the vomit that a lot of people put out there. So I’d just say, keep on doing with what you’re doing :)!
Hi Virendra, thanks so much for your encouragement. Yip, I want to keep it real and relateable. I’m sure that will bring it’s challenges, particularly about oversharing personal thoughts and opinions! But I’m going to give it a go! What are your goals this year – have you got something that excites or will challenge you? Best wishes, Karen
Well I bothered to read your blog, and even though I’m not a woman, I am a 49 year old. Having not been a great writer in the past, I am learning to do this everyday for my blog. It’s taking me out of my comfort zone, but as you say, the kids are now doing their own thing, so I can do my own thing. I accept the challenge, bring it on.
Thanks Nigel, I hope that coming out of your comfort zone helps you learn something new about yourself. Best wishes and thanks for reading 🙂 Cheers, Karen
Hi KD:
That’s very interesting what you say “Write like no one is reading.” Does that mean casting fate to the wind and not worrying about pleasing everyone? If so, that could certainly free you.
I admire you for committing to write daily, I certainly haven’t been able to even though it would likely help me in my Google rankings!
Anyway, I hope you enjoy being 49!
Hi Christopher, thanks so much and yes, writing like no one is reading can set you free. No fear of judgement, just enjoy the process of writing and being in the moment. I’m not quite 49, but it’s that year, so I’m going to embrace it front on, along with this writing challenge I’ve been tasked with. Cheers, Karen
The challenge for me often is the first sentence. How to phrase it, what should be the key point right off the bat, will the reader be interested in what I have to say, etc. To combat that writer’s block, I will often frame up a post first. This forces me to add in sections and key points.
Then that first sentence, the first paragraph, and the rest will flow. It is not like we have nothing to say. Most certainly we all do. You provide perfect examples for us all with your writing journey. I had not considered obtaining the services of a coach but I can see where that would help.
Secondly, a writing challenge can also bring you to the laptop and get you started, so I think you are on the right track. Having a published novel is also not a bad thing to remind yourself of too as you hunker down to bang out some thoughts. I felt like I was peering into your mind a bit while reading this post, and it bodes well for what is to come.
You do have an affinity for the craft, and for sure I will be back to see what further treats that you choose to share with us all in your posts and articles. Thanks for sharing and best of luck. What is the name of your novel, by the way, and where can we get access to it?
Hi Dave, thanks so much for your feedback and for sharing your frustrations which I’m sure many aspiring and experienced writers can relate to! Doing this daily challenge has really helped me push through that writers block we all dread. My book is called Fraud and Fabrication. It’s available for sale on Amazon as both a paperback and a kindle. The second book is still firmly entrenched in my imagination! One day… Best wishes, Karen
Hello Karen! I really like your writing style and it’s the reason I constantly come back to your site.
Writing is a skill that requires practice to flourish, as any other skill. But we can sometimes get discouraged thinking in other people’s reaction to our writings. Disconnecting people’s critiques from our writing goals can take us to the next level. I’m glad you have not followed what you believed the general public would say, but instead you have paid attention to what your writing coach, Dixie Maria Carlton has advised. Your decision has benefited us all. Thank you!
Thanks Henry, I’ve been religiously doing the daily writing as challenged by Dixie Maria, but in an effort for true expression, so of my writing will never see the light of day. I’m trying to keep it real and honest – so on the occasions I’ve written something way too personal to share, I’ll be reserving my right to hold that close to my heart. But rest assured I’m definitely writing daily and embracing this challenge! Best wishes, Karen